Divorce in Minnesota, Part 1

North-Star State a champion on domestic-violence issues: we offer a minority position in Part 1 and go mainstream in Part 2

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To begin, let’s not dwell on all the legal ramifications of divorce, or as it’s called in many states, dissolution of marriage.

Maybe it’s not best to consider legal stuff first

Obviously, if you’re still in the consideration phase, that is, you’re deliberating the pros and cons of ending your marriage, you may understandably be caught up in the mental,  spinning “hamster wheel” of an overwhelming, seemingly-endless number of topics: What about the kids? Who gets what?  Where will we live? Who pays for what? What about schools? What about holidays?

Almost everybody contemplating divorce does that, and almost everybody focuses on the legal aspects–sometimes vindictively–way too soon.

Don’t overlook counseling

That being said, if you’re sure you need to end your marriage, we can help you find a compatible, trained and experienced divorce attorney; simply scroll to the bottom of your screen and take advantage of our free evaluation. However, if you’re in the throes of wondering what to do, may we suggest professional counseling?

Domestic violence? Address it now

Of course, if children are involved, the emotional equation is much more complex than if no children can be traumatized. Even more important is the issue of domestic violence: if your family equation includes domestic violence, you simply must address that issue as quickly as possible. In other words, if no children are involved, you may have some “wiggle room.” On the other hand, you may not have any choice but to respond to an emergency situation–if that’s the case, call 911, right now.

Men can be victims, too

Just for the record and to let you know, even though most domestic violence is attributed to men, that is not always the case. In fact, some states even have programs for men who are victims of domestic violence. Here’s a few links:

• Battered Men.com;
• Domestic Violence Against Men: Know the Signs;
• Men: Hidden Victims of Domestic Violence;
• “Intimate Partner Violence Against Men“;
• a university paper that has since been re-titled,since publication under the original title: “Male Victims of Domestic Violence:  A Substantive and Methodological Research Review.”

Most states have come out of the Stone Age and will send police or sheriff’s deputies ASAP to domestic violence complaints.

Counseling & emotional well being

Even if domestic violence is not present–back to emotional health–you simply must recognize that many divorces triggers profound feelings of grief. It’s one thing to break up with someone you’ve been dating and have become fond of, affectionate toward, etc. For many folks, it’s quite another matter to end a marriage.

It’s not uncommon to read reports from divorces that say something to the effect that “It felt like the dream died”; or “It felt like a death in the family”;  or “I could not figure out how to go on.”

If you feel that way,or anyway close,  please take advantage of our resources.

Next time: Less about men-as-minority-victims, and more about all the state’s resources in Divorce in Minnesota, Part 2.

Free evaluation

We can help. If you’re ready to begin the search for a compatible, well trained, experienced divorce attorney, you can start with our free case evaluation. If you need more information, please browse our site, using the tabs at the top of the page.