Jon Gosselin and ex-wife, Kate, leading separate lives

Just four years ago Jon Gosselin and Kate Gosselin were joined together in the joyful struggle of rearing their eight young children. It wasn’t always fun to watch, with Kate’s browbeating and Jon’s dodging, but somehow you believed they both loved their kids. They were a unit, and they were dedicated to doing what they both thought was best for their oversized brood.

Not anymore, today Jon Gosselin and his ex-wife Kate are leading two separate lives. In a recent interview with Entertainment Tonight‘s Brooke Anderson, Jon Gosselin discusses how he and his ex-wife interact- or how they don’t interact. Their divorce was finalized in 2009, after 10 years of marriage (and most people who watched their television show would agree, for Jon, that ten years must have felt like 20).

What does Jon Gosselin say? “I don’t have a relationship with Kate. There is no relationship. Text and email. That’s it.” It’s just as bad as it sounds. The pair do not even talk or exchange greetings when they make child exchanges. According to jon, “The nanny comes out and I exchange the kids at her gate or at the bus stop,” he explained. “I don’t physically see her.”

Kate is not the only one Jon Gosselin doesn’t see. Jon admits he lives in a cabin in the woods without television or internet connectivity. According to Jon Gosselin, he has “hit rock bottom like 20 times and bounced back.” Jon Gosselin has found work and is currently waiting tables at a nearby restaurant, but he has had no connection to reality television for many years. The reality show, Jon & Kate Plus 8, featuring the Gosselin children, permanently left the network in 2011. Jon admits working as a waiter was hard at first, but he has been pleasantly surprised at the reaction of his customers, many of which were fans of the show and recognize him.

Jon Gosselin does not pay child support

Due to the nature of the split and Kate’s income, Jon does not pay child support, although he is quick to note that he does see the children, he is a part of their lives and he does pay for many things for the children such as groceries and anything they need while they are with him at his house. Kate is responsible for caring for the children financially when they are with her.

Who loses?

The losers in all of this mess are Jon and Kate’s children. I may be biased, and television may not always make an accurate portrayal of what is actually going on in a family, but regardless of whether Jon was too permissive or laid back and not involved with the kids or Kate was an overaggressive, perfectionist, their kids need both of their parents. Divorce is awful for children. Yes, they are resilient and they will most likely grow up to be well-adjusted adults, but wouldn’t it be wonderful if Jon and Kate could grow up and put their differences behind them and show kids what it really means to be an adult?